Maybe Designers are just overly-previous moody ‘creative types.’

Maybe they need therapy.

Who knows.

In any case, clients – here’s 5 design requests 100% guaranteed to fill your design agency with terror this Halloween:

#1 ‘Can we use Comic Sans for this one?’

The answer is no. No we cannot ‘use comic sans for this one.’ Do not under any circumstances ask your Designer to use comic sans unless you’re ready for a look of instant disbelief and disgust. It’s neither ‘casual’ nor ‘playful.’ In case you’re interested, the poor management of the visual weight within the letterforms is to blame for our hate for this infamous child-like font. And whilst we’re on the topic, unless you’re a cheesy Egyptian restaurant, please stay away from Papyrus, too. Instead, why not try Helvetica? The kerning is just lovely.

 

#2 ‘We want to use this photo but it’s a little blurry, can you fix it?’

Again, the short answer is no. It’s ultra low-res, the lighting is terrible, the angle is even worse – oh, and the giant dark shadow is covering half of the person’s face. But that’s ok – because the designer can ‘fix it’, right? NO. SEND US A PROPER PHOTO. EVEN MY NOKIA 7650 COULD TAKE BETTER PHOTOS THAN THIS. Better still, hire a professional photographer. High-quality photography can make or break a brand. Trust us. We’ve seen this scenario play out many times.

 

#3 ‘Can you just quickly….’

No. If you haven’t already managed to tick your Designers off as hard as you had hoped, just tell them you need your next piece of work ASAP. As in, within the next hour. Last second press ads are our undisputed favourite. For extra points, make sure you then take your time to reply to their emails. This WILL drive them to the point of madness, we promise!

 

#4 ‘Can we make the logo bigger?

The classic. This one we can do. But we probably don’t want to. Simply increasing the size of your logo to half the size of the page does not ‘make the brand more memorable,’ it makes it look out of proportion. For double points: Send your Designer the smallest version of your logo you can find, let them do their job and THEN say that the logo needs to be bigger and watch the steam coming out of their ears. Congratulations, you’ve now got one grumpy Designer on your hands.

 

#5 ‘Can we reduce the amount of white space?’

Finally, to really lower the mental stability of your Designer, tell them that there’s too much white space on the page.  I mean, who needs white space anyway, right?  Ignore the lies your Designer might try to tell you, such as “white space makes is easier to read and helps the design to breathe’. Does font really need to breathe anyway?! You think not. More is 100% always better and white space is a waste of valuable ad space that NEEDS to be filled ASAP!